Yesterday, my husband and I had a conversation about something I have been wanting to do for a long time - become a stay at home mom again. My son is now one year old. My daughter is seven. The last three years that I have been working have flown by and I feel as though I have missed a lot of their lives - because I have.
Kay is enrolled in school, but there have been times a school event has come up and I have been unable to attend because I was at work. Al is in daycare. For a while, he was more attached to the babysitter than he was to me . . . and I hated that. Now, every Monday morning when I drop him off, he grips me and lays his head on my shoulder as I try to pass him to the babysitter. It breaks my heart every single time. It breaks my heart further when he has no problem being passed to her on Wednesday.
My bosses have had no problem letting me work less than 40 hours every week. I drop Kay off at school and I pick her up. It makes for a roughly 32-35 hour work week. It gives me time to spend with them and take care of my house, make supper for everyone. It also saves money because if I didn't do that, Kay would have to go from school to daycare, which would cost at least $300 every month. I'm already paying $300 every month for Al to be in daycare.
But, change is something that is inevitable. Now, it sounds like 40 hours every week will be required. And I can't pay that - either with my wallet or with my heart. If I worked 40 hours, I would be shilling out $600 every month just in daycare costs and I would miss out on my children's lives even more than I am now.
When I told Tony about what was happening at work, he could tell that it was getting me down. And he asked me if I wanted to stay home again. I said yes. Then he said something that struck home: "Baby, you say you want to do something, but then you think of reasons why you can't."
And that got me to thinking: How often do I do that? How
often do I stand in my own way? How often do I prevent myself from doing what I want to do?
How often do you? What have you prevented yourself from doing because you say "I can't"?
Whatever it is that you want to do, get out of your own way and do it. I'm not saying dive right in. Lives are busy and hectic. Be wise about it. A plan should be formed that will allow you to do whatever it is you want to do.
If you can do it this instant - DO IT! GET OUT OF YOUR WAY! Want to go see a midnight showing at a theater? That shouldn't take a lot of planning. Don't say you can't because you have work in the morning. After the movie, get home, go to sleep and when you wake up drink a nice cup of coffee. Walk a little bit during work to get the blood flowing through your body again.
Want to take that trip to another state you've always fantasized about? DO IT! Start saving and planning right now! GET OUT OF YOUR WAY! Don't say you can't because it's not in the budget. Every penny you put toward that trip is another step closer.
Start doing it today!
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